When No One's Watching
by Makaze no Anrui
Summary: A very serious fic that deals with suicide and other themes along these lines. Each chapter's set to a different song. I'm not good at descriptions. Please read and review. Thanks.


Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or any of its characters. I do, however, own this story and Minette and Ashlyn Condra. NO TAKEE!!! Mrow!! Enjoy!!  
  
**Part One- Imaginary  
**  
_It was dark, and rain poured down around them. She stood and held her father's hand as they lowered the casket into the ground. She looked up at his face, which was unreadable.  
'Daddy,' the four-year-old whispered quietly. 'When's Mommy coming back?' She felt him stiffen.  
'She's...not.' he replied, sounding as though he was forcing the words out of his mouth. 'Mommy had to go away, and she can't come back.'  
'Why can't we go with her?' she wondered. He looked down at her, smiling sadly.  
'It's not that easy. Now let's go home.' He turned away, and she followed him, not understanding what had happened.  
_

**SEVEN YEARS LATER...  
**

Blood flowed from the fresh slice in the young girl's pale skin. She dunked her arm into the bucket of water next to her, to keep the wound from closing up. She felt herself get light-headed, and welcomed it. Soon, there would be no pain, no awful memories to harbour in her mind any longer...  
  
_I linger in the doorway  
__An alarm clock screaming  
__Monsters calling my name  
Let me stay  
__Where the wind will whisper to me  
__Where the raindrops  
__As they're falling tell a story_  
  
She could hear the rain pounding against the outside walls. It was a wonderful time...she was glad that she could die, like this. Maybe now she would find peace. Maybe now she would be content. Maybe now....she wouldn't cry. She would never see death, never feel pain, never have to face the world like this, and never hear the voices that spoke to her in the back of her mind like a constant drone.  
  
_In my field of paper flowers  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
I lie inside myself for hours  
And watch my purple skies fly over me  
_  
There was something strangely..._nice_...about dying. It might just be the fact that she was going to find her mother again. Smiling, she thought of the irony that they would die on the same day, only seven years apart. If not for her father, they'd all have died the same day. But that bastard had to save her, and condemn her to living through Hell for the next seven years.  
  
_Don't say I'm out of touch  
With this rampant chaos- your reality  
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge  
The nightmare I've built my own world to escape_  
  
She supposed there was probably a _reason_, of course. There always was with this kind of thing. But nevertheless, she had no doubts in her mind that it would've been kinder to let her die instead of living like this. This was no way to live. This was the way that- when someone like her DID live through- they couldn't help wanting to end it all.  
  
_In my field of paper flowers  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
I lie inside myself for hours  
And watch my purple skies fly over me  
_  
Were those footsteps? No, they couldn't be. No one would be out this late, if they didn't want to get caught by the caretaker. Of course, Minette wasn't worried about getting caught. She wouldn't have to worry about anything soon. She could feel herself going...could feel her life ebb away with the blood...  
She heard someone speaking, another screaming, more footsteps, a lower voice...it was so distant, she couldn't understand what was going on...But someone then lifted her up, and she could feel herself struggling against it. She wanted to go. She wanted to die.  
  
_Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming  
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights  
Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming  
The Goddess of imaginary light_  
  
For some reason, everything seemed far away. She couldn't speak properly, and everything seemed so strange. She continued to bleed, and faintly, distantly, she could hear her blood splatter onto the cold stone. In her delirium, she smiled slightly. It was music that she never wanted to stop hearing.  
  
_For in my field of paper flowers  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
I lie inside myself for hours  
And watch my purple skies fly over me  
_  
She was losing consciousness. Finally...finally she could go. The blood kept coming, the screaming was still going on, and she felt as though she would never feel this good again. It was perfect...even more so because they had found her. Now they would have to live with the fact that she'd died right in front of their eyes for the rest of their days. Ahh, it seemed wonderful...for the moment you die, your life becomes eternal. Death was not the end...it was the beginning- for her. She could start over. And maybe the next time around, she'd do better.

'The moment you die, your like becomes eternal. Death is not the end...it's the beginning.' ---from Confidential Confessions, volume 1I hope you like it!!! Please review, and when reviewing, PLEASE CRITIQUE!!! I've been working on this fic for at least three years, and I just now TOTALLY revamped it. It used to be a humorous story, but...well; you can see how it turned out on your own. . 


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